The thing about having a communication blog is that, really, everything communicates. Everything you say, of course, but also what you wear, how you spend your time and money, the friends you have... it all says something about you, intended or not. Even accurate or not, it communicates.
So, that's why I feel justified in talking about how to handle domestic chores on this blog. I am a huge fan of outsourcing. Really, I believe in outsourcing virtually anything that is not either one of your personal strengths, something you genuinely want to improve upon for your own internal reasons, or something you hold dear to your heart and soul and therefore do not want to hand over to another person to handle. Often, the three go together so keeping particular things "in-house" is a no-brainer. For example, my friend Lydia absolutely adores gardening. She is good at gardening, she wants to be a better gardener all the time, and she holds gardening dear to her heart. So, Lydia should garden!
I, on the other hand, am lucky if my thumb gets even the slightest tint of greenish yellow in Spring and, when I am honest with myself, I really don't prefer to garden. It can be fun to pick out plants and flowers and even a bit satisfying to stick them in the ground and have an instant remodel of my front flower mound. But really, I'd be equally happy (okay, maybe even more happy) to have our earth-loving, a-bit-too-laid-back, talented landscape designer/gardener work his magic in our garden and then adore his mastery when we have dinner picnics on the front lawn.
Still, sometimes I feel guilty about this position I so passionately hold. It's as though I have some old programming that says that my very womanhood depends on my ability to handle all of the zillion domestic duties involved in caring for a household. That makes sense since my mom really was a brilliant homemaker. Our house was drop-by-visitor ready anytime, she made dinner most nights, she showered every day(!!) and she was always ready to go out with my dad when he got home from work and wanted to see a movie or go get dinner on a whim. When I get particularly insecure about my total disregard for domestic prowess, I like to seek out others who share my position. It's validating. That's why I was pleased to find this article in the Wall Street Journal and then run across this wish-I-could-say-things-this-beautifully blog post a few weeks ago on my friend Melissa's blog.
We have a wonderful woman deep clean for us once a month and we have a brilliant, fun, totally fabulous person come in for two hours three days a week and do whatever makes life easier that day. Some days she just picks up the total crazy mess we've left in every room. She has installed a closet organizer system, reorganized our kitchen cabinets and cleaned out our garage. She has made dinner and played countless games with our girls while she did various things around the house. She is a huge, meaningful part of our lives and I could not be more grateful for the help. It would take a pretty dramatic change in our financial situation (which is not extravagant, by any means) to let go of this amazing gift in our lives.
I'm not sure what this communicates about me - or anyone else who does it any other way. I just want to offer it up to anyone who can swing it. Life is so much better with help. Feelin' the love tonight (and the thrill that tomorrow is Monday and Olivia will be here!), I guess.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Sunday, January 4, 2009
2009 Theme: The Year of Sleep
So, I'm exhausted. My kids have all been sick for the last week - really sick, fevers, throwing up (sorry, just setting the scene), whining, "carry me", "I don't feel well" every couple of minutes, closed drapes and too much TV kind of sick. Poor little sweet babies; I wish I could take it all away for them. I would SO be sick on their behalf anyday.
But, I was writing about my New Year's theme here. So, let me tie all this in. I am exhausted all the time. I don't sleep enough. I simply don't want to give up evening and late night hours to sleep when it is such fabulous time to talk with my husband, work on projects, catch up on work, and occasionally sit on the couch and watch TV. Ever since we had babies, I have done this - stayed up later and later to stretch out the time I have to do things outside of mothering. And it's been fine, mostly. I would get 6ish hours of sleep, have a good amount of coffee in the morning and all would be dandy.
Until... sometime recently. I don't even know when. But I either hit the critical point of sleep deprivation - or I suddenly hit the critical point of aging where my body couldn't just push through the sleep thing anymore. Whatever the cause, my lack of sleep started to really show up in my life. I was edgier. I got irritated at the girls unnecessarily. I was short with Jim when it was totally undeserved. The strangest part for me was that I FELT tired so often. I really hadn't felt tired much in my life, except right before I'd go to bed. I began feeling tired even in the morning, which is my super productive, take-on-the-world time.
I decided to test out going to bed earlier to see what impact it would have. I realize this may seem totally ridiculous to those of you out there who already held sleep in its appropriate high-value place in your life, but for me the difference was astonishing! Even just a few nights in a row of solid 7.5 to 8ish hours of sleep made such a huge difference in my outlook, attitude, the way I ate, and, in particular, in my interactions with my family, clients, friends, everyone... which is why I decided to write about it here. Sleep is so very relevant to communication! Now, slap me with the obvious hammer.
I am so enlightened that I have decided that my theme for 2009 is sleep. The goal is 7.5 hours on average a night (averaged weekly.) I am very excited to experience life with a totally full sleep tank. The problem is, I'm going to bed too late right now... hope I can figure out a way to sleep in tomorrow. Otherwise, I have to go to bed at 8pm tomorrow night to make up the sleep hours.
How much do you sleep a night? What is your ideal amount?
But, I was writing about my New Year's theme here. So, let me tie all this in. I am exhausted all the time. I don't sleep enough. I simply don't want to give up evening and late night hours to sleep when it is such fabulous time to talk with my husband, work on projects, catch up on work, and occasionally sit on the couch and watch TV. Ever since we had babies, I have done this - stayed up later and later to stretch out the time I have to do things outside of mothering. And it's been fine, mostly. I would get 6ish hours of sleep, have a good amount of coffee in the morning and all would be dandy.
Until... sometime recently. I don't even know when. But I either hit the critical point of sleep deprivation - or I suddenly hit the critical point of aging where my body couldn't just push through the sleep thing anymore. Whatever the cause, my lack of sleep started to really show up in my life. I was edgier. I got irritated at the girls unnecessarily. I was short with Jim when it was totally undeserved. The strangest part for me was that I FELT tired so often. I really hadn't felt tired much in my life, except right before I'd go to bed. I began feeling tired even in the morning, which is my super productive, take-on-the-world time.
I decided to test out going to bed earlier to see what impact it would have. I realize this may seem totally ridiculous to those of you out there who already held sleep in its appropriate high-value place in your life, but for me the difference was astonishing! Even just a few nights in a row of solid 7.5 to 8ish hours of sleep made such a huge difference in my outlook, attitude, the way I ate, and, in particular, in my interactions with my family, clients, friends, everyone... which is why I decided to write about it here. Sleep is so very relevant to communication! Now, slap me with the obvious hammer.
I am so enlightened that I have decided that my theme for 2009 is sleep. The goal is 7.5 hours on average a night (averaged weekly.) I am very excited to experience life with a totally full sleep tank. The problem is, I'm going to bed too late right now... hope I can figure out a way to sleep in tomorrow. Otherwise, I have to go to bed at 8pm tomorrow night to make up the sleep hours.
How much do you sleep a night? What is your ideal amount?
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